31 BIG Signs He Is Fighting His Feelings For You (2024)

It’s frustrating.

You’ve started falling for a guy but are unsure if the spark is mutual.

You may have noticed some emotions, but he hasn’t said anything. One minute he has the hots for you, the next, he acts as if you don’t even exist.

High chances this guy likes you but could be hiding his feelings for you.

But how do you know if he’s hiding his feelings?

This article aims to address this question. This article discusses 31 signs he is fighting his feelings for you..

Here’s what you’ll learn.

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Let’s get right into it.

Why Is He Fighting His Feelings for You?

He’s Unsure of What He’s Feeling

He may be fighting his feelings because he’s unsure of what he’s feeling.

It’s confusing when you start to like someone. Your brain starts overthinking things and makes up scenarios that may or may not happen. If this is the case, he needs time to figure out his emotions.

He’s Not Ready for a Relationship

Another reason he is fighting his feelings for you is he’s not ready for a relationship.

This could be for various reasons. Maybe he just got out of a long-term relationship or wants to focus on his career.

If this is the case, he’ll likely keep you at a distance and avoid getting too close.

He’s Afraid of Getting Hurt

He may also hide his feelings for you because he’s afraid of being hurt.

This is usually the case if he’s been hurt in the past. He may have trust issues, or he doesn’t want to get attached to someone only to have them leave later on.

If this is why he’s fighting his feelings, he’ll likely be hesitant to get close to you, and he may not open up about his feelings even if he does have them.

He’s Afraid Of Being Vulnerable

In some cases, he may be fighting his feelings for you because of societal constructs on men and vulnerability.

For example, he may believe that men should always be strong and shouldn’t show any emotion. He may think that it’s not “manly” to express his feelings.

If this is the case, he’ll likely bottle up his emotions, and he may not even be aware that he has feelings for you.

He Doesn’t Trust You

Another possibility is he doesn’t trust you.

This could be for various reasons, including he doesn’t trust people in general or has had his heart broken before. If he doesn’t trust you, he will not let himself fall for you.

You’re With Someone Else, and He Doesn’t Want to Interfere

Another possibility is you’re already with someone else, and he doesn’t want to interfere.

In this case, he’s likely not going to make a move even if he does have feelings for you. He’ll respect your relationship, and he won’t want to come between you and your partner.

He Feels a Need to Be in Control

In some cases, he may be fighting his feelings because he feels a need to be in control.

This usually happens with guys who are used to being in charge. They like feeling in control of the situation and don’t like when things are out of control.

If this is the case, he’ll likely try to control the situation by not letting himself have feelings for you.

Signs He is fighting his feelings for you

Signs He is Fighting His Feelings for You

#1. He Gets Distant Whenever You Talk About Your Feelings

If you’re wondering whether or not he is fighting his feelings for you, one sign to look out for is if he suddenly gets distant whenever you talk about your feelings.

It could be that he’s feeling overwhelmed and doesn’t know how to respond, so he withdraws instead.

Alternatively, he may be trying to protect himself from getting too emotionally attached to you.

If he’s constantly changing the subject or making excuses to leave when the conversation turns personal, it’s a sign that he’s not ready to open up just yet.

However, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care about you. It could be just the opposite. He may be trying to keep his distance, so he doesn’t get hurt by pulling away.

Related: How To Tell If A Guy Likes You But Is Hiding It

#2. You Hang Out A Lot Without Going on Dates

If you’ve noticed that you have been hanging out a lot recently, but he hasn’t made any moves to turn it into a date, it could be because he is fighting his feelings for you.

If he’s fighting his feelings for you, he may try to downplay your relationship by hanging out with you without going on dates.

He may say he just wants to be friends or isn’t ready for a relationship.

However, his actions speak louder than his words. If he’s constantly texting or calling you, trying to spend time with you, and getting to know you better, he’s probably interested in something more.

If he’s avoiding labels and commitment, he’s likely trying to protect his heart from getting hurt. But the more time he spends with you, the harder it will be for him to deny his feelings. Eventually, he’ll have to decide whether to take a chance on love or stay single and risk losing you forever.

He may also be waiting for you to make the first move.

#3. He Acts Awkward Around You

One of the most obvious signs he is fighting his feelings for you is he’s acting differently around you.

He may get tongue-tied, blush, or stammer when he’s around you. His palms may sweat, and he may have trouble making eye contact.

This usually happens because he’s nervous and doesn’t know how to act around you. He may be worried about saying or doing the wrong thing.

Alternatively, he may not be sure how you feel about him, and he doesn’t want to make a move until he knows for sure.

Signs he's fighting his feelings for you
Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

#4. He Shows Off Whenever You’re Around

If he’s constantly trying to impress you or show off whenever you’re around, it could be a sign he’s fighting his feelings for you.

He may try to make himself look good by bragging about his accomplishments or talking up his skills. He may also try to make you laugh or get your attention by acting silly.

Deep down, he wants your approval, and he’s hoping that if he impresses you enough, you’ll develop feelings for him.

Of course, this doesn’t always work out the way he hopes. In fact, he may just end up pushing you away.

#5. You Catch Him Stealing Glances of You

Another dead giveaway that he’s fighting his feelings is he looks away whenever your eyes meet.

He may be attracted to you, but he doesn’t want you to know it. So instead, he’ll try to avoid eye contact and steal glances of you when he thinks you’re not looking.

If you catch him staring at you, he’ll probably look away quickly and pretend he wasn’t looking in the first place.

This may be because he’s shy or doesn’t want to come on too strong. But it could also be a sign that he’s not ready to admit his feelings just yet.

If you’re interested in him, use this opportunity to strike up a conversation. Chances are he’s dying to talk to you, but he’s too nervous about making the first move. So, go ahead and take the lead.

#6. His Behavior is Inconsistent

One of the most common signs he is fighting his feelings for you is he can’t seem to make up his mind.

One minute he’ll be flirting with you, and the next, he’ll be acting like a complete gentleman. He may be hot and cold, distant one day and clingy the next.

This usually happens because he doesn’t know how he feels about you. He may be attracted to you, but he’s not sure if he wants to pursue a relationship.

As a result, he’ll send mixed signals, and his behavior will be everywhere. If you’re interested in him, it’s best to take things slow and see where it goes.

#7. He Gets Jealous When He Sees You with Other Guys

If he gets jealous when he sees you with other guys, it’s a clear sign he’s fighting his feelings for you.

He may not want to admit it, but he’s afraid of losing you to someone else.

Deep down, he knows he has feelings for you, but he doesn’t want to risk getting hurt. So instead, he’ll try to keep you to himself, and he won’t be happy when he sees you talking or flirting with other guys.

If you’re interested in him, use this opportunity to let him know how you feel. Chances are he’s been waiting for you to make the first move.

Signs a man is fighting his feelings for you
Image by Mircea from Pixabay

#8. He’s Overly Critical of Other Guys in Your Life

If he’s suddenly started pointing out all the things he doesn’t like about the other guys in your life, it could be a sign he’s fighting his feelings for you. 

He might say that your guy friends are losers, or he doesn’t think they’re good enough for you.

Alternatively, he might try to find out if you’re interested in other guys. He might bring up gossip he’s heard about other people, or he might ask pointed questions about whether you think certain guys are attractive

Part of this could be that he’s subconsciously trying to sabotage your relationships, so he has an excuse to step in.

But it could also be because he’s jealous and doesn’t want to see you with anyone else. If you’re interested in him, let him know how you feel. He might need a little push to make a move finally.

#9. He Refers to What You Post on Social Media

If he’s constantly liking your posts or making reference to something you posted on social media, it could be a sign that he’s fighting his feelings for you.

He’s probably following you on social media, and he’s keeping tabs on what you’re up to. He’s interested in you in real life, and he wants to know what you’re doing.

However, he’s not ready to admit his feelings just yet. So instead, he’ll try to stay in the background and only interact with you online.

If you’re interested in him, use this opportunity to reach out to him offline. Invite him to hang out or send him a direct message.

#10. He Tries to Make You Jealous

If he’s trying to make you jealous, it’s a clear sign he likes you, but he’s fighting his feelings.

He might do this by talking about other women he’s interested in, flirting with other people in front of you, or even trying to set you up with one of his friends.

While it might seem like he’s just trying to toy with your emotions, he’s likely doing it because he’s insecure about your feelings for him. If he didn’t care about you, he wouldn’t bother trying to make you jealous.

By trying to make you jealous, he’s trying to convince himself that he’s not interested in you by putting up a barrier between the two of you. Or, he might be hoping that you’ll get jealous and make a move first.

Either way, it’s a good indicator that he’s got some strong feelings for you. 

Related: 44 Clear Signs Your Male Friend Has Feelings For You 

#11. He Randomly Texts or Calls You

If he’s fighting his feelings for you, he might start randomly texting or calling you.

This is his way of trying to keep you in his life without admitting that he likes you. He might also start showing up to places where he knows you’ll be, just to “accidentally” run into you.

It might seem like he’s just being friendly, but he’s trying to find ways to keep you in his life.

If you’re interested in him, use this opportunity to let him know how you feel. He’s probably looking for a sign from you that it’s okay to admit his feelings.

#12. His Friends Tease Him or Drop Hints

If his friends are constantly teasing him or they drop hints about his feelings for you, it’s clear that he likes you but doesn’t want you to know yet.

This could be a way for them to gauge his reaction and see how he feels about you.

Another sign is if they start dropping hints that he likes you or that the two of you would make a good couple. Again, this is their way of gauging his reaction and seeing how he feels about you.

If he gets flustered or starts blushing when they bring you up, it’s a good indication that he’s fighting his feelings for you.

Of course, the best way to find out is to ask him directly.

How to know if a man is fighting his feelings for you
Photo by Helena Lopes from pexels

#13. He Asks for Your Opinion

If he’s constantly asking for your opinion, he values your opinion and cares about what you think.

He may ask your opinion on a range of topics, from what you think of his new haircut to whether he should take that new job. This is his way of seeking your approval and showing that he cares about what you think.

He’s also hoping to better understand how you think and feel by hearing your thoughts on things.

Ultimately, he’s just trying to get to know you better, and he’s hoping that by doing so, he can figure out if he has feelings for you or not.

#14. He’s At His Best When He’s Around You

We all put our best foot forward when we’re around someone we’re attracted to.

But if he’s constantly trying to impress you and he’s on his best behavior whenever he’s around you, it’s a good sign that he likes you.

He might try to make himself look good by dressing up or impressing you with his achievements. Or he might try to make you laugh by cracking jokes or being extra charming.

Whatever it is, he’s likely doing it because he wants to make a good impression on you, and he’s hoping that you’ll return his feelings.

#15. He Gets Moody or Angry at You for No Reason

If he’s constantly getting moody or angry at you for no reason, it might be because he’s fighting his feelings for you.

He may be taking out his frustrations on you because he can’t express how he feels. Or, he might be trying to push you away because he’s afraid of getting hurt.

Either way, it’s not a healthy way to deal with his feelings, and it’s not fair to you. If he can’t control his emotions, it might be best to take some space from him until he can figure things out.

You deserve someone who is emotionally stable and capable of dealing with their feelings healthily.

#16. He’s Extra Nice to Your Friends

If he’s constantly going out of his way to be nice to your friends, it’s a sign he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

He might do this by buying them gifts, taking them out for drinks, or even being extra friendly and accommodating.

But why would he do this?

Well, he might be trying to get them to like him, so they’ll put in a good word for him. Or he might be hoping that they’ll see how great he is and convince you to give him a chance.

Either way, it’s a clear sign that he likes you, but he’s too afraid to tell you directly.

#17. He Always Explains Himself to You

If he’s constantly trying to explain his actions or words to you, it’s a sign that he’s fighting his feelings for you.

He doesn’t want you to misunderstand him, so he goes out of his way to make sure you know he isn’t interested in you romantically.

He might say things like, “I’m not flirting with you, I was just being friendly,” or “I wasn’t ignoring you; I was just preoccupied.”

Whatever it is, he’s trying to make sure you know he doesn’t like you in that way.

But the truth is, if he didn’t like you, he wouldn’t care how you interpreted his actions or words. He would just do and say whatever he wanted without worrying about how you would react.

#18. You Clarify What You Want from the Connection, but He Doesn’t

You’ve probably told him that you like him. However, he hasn’t said anything about his feelings for you.Or maybe he tells you that he wants ttonbe just friends 

This could be because he’s fighting his feelings for you, and he doesn’t want to admit it.

Or, he might not be sure how he feels and hopes that he’ll have more time to figure it out by staying quiet.

Either way, it’s not a healthy way to deal with his feelings, and it’s not fair to you. You deserve someone that’s honest about their feelings and willing to communicate with you.

If he can’t do that, it might be best to move on.

#19. He Asks Your Friends About Your Personal Details

If he’s constantly asking your friends personal questions about you, it’s a sign he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

He might be trying to get them to tell him things about you that you wouldn’t share with him directly. Or, he might be hoping that they’ll give him some insight into how you feel about him.

Either way, it’s a clear sign that he likes you, but he’s too afraid to tell you directly.

#20. He Avoids You Sometimes

If he’s avoiding you sometimes, it’s a sign that he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

He might do this by making excuses not to see you, canceling plans at the last minute, or even being extra busy when he knows you’re free.

But why would he do this?

Well, he might be trying to create some distance between you two, so he can have time to figure out how he feels.

Or, he might be afraid of getting too close to you and hopes that he can keep his own feelings under control by avoiding you.

is he fighting his feelings for you
Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

#21. He Does Little Things to Show You That He Cares

Despite trying to avoid you, a guy who’s hiding his feelings for you will do little things to show you that he cares.

He might do this by text messaging you to check-in, sending you a gift, or even randomly stopping by your place.

But why would he do this?

He might be trying to show you that he cares without having to say it. Or, he might be hoping that the gesture will be enough to get you to like him back.

Either way, it’s a pretty clear sign that he likes you, but he’s too afraid to tell you directly.

#22. He Shares Personal Details about Himself

If he’s constantly sharing personal details about himself, it’s a sign he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

He might do this by telling you about his ex-girlfriends, his family, or even just his hopes and dreams.

But why would he do this?

Well, he might be trying to create a connection with you by sharing these personal details.

Or, he might be hoping that you’ll feel closer to him and maybe even start to catch feelings for him.

Either way, it’s a clear sign he likes you, but he’s too afraid to tell you directly.

#23. He Hangs on Every Word and Remembers Everything You Say

Have you ever been talking to someone who just doesn’t seem to be listening? Their eyes wander around the room, or they give one-word answers and move on to the next topic.

It’s frustrating, right?

Now imagine the opposite. Someone who hangs on every word you say, remembers the smallest details about your life and is always keen to learn more.

That’s the kind of person who likes you but is fighting their feelings.

They want to know everything about you because they’re interested in you. But at the same time, they’re afraid of getting too close and revealing their true feelings.

It’s a tough spot to be in, but if you’re on the receiving end of this treatment, it’s a clear sign he likes you.

#24. You Feel Both Adored and Ignored

When a guy likes you but is fighting his feelings, you’ll probably feel both adored and ignored at the same time.

On the one hand, he’ll constantly be showering you with attention and care. He’ll go out of his way to do things for you, he’ll always be there when you need him, and he’ll make sure you feel loved and appreciated.

But on the other hand, he’ll also be distant and aloof. He’ll avoid you sometimes, he won’t want to talk about his feelings, and he might even ignore your texts or calls.

It’s confusing, but it’s just a sign that he likes you, but he’s fighting his feelings.

#25. Despite Acting Distant, He’s Always There to Help You

Even though he’s fighting his feelings, he can’t help but be drawn to you. So even when he’s acting distant, he’s always there to help you.

He might do this by offering to help you with a project, giving you a ride home, or even just lending you a shoulder to cry on.

But why would he do this?

He might be trying to help you without getting too close to you. Or, he might be hoping that by helping you, you’ll start to have feelings for him.

How does a man who's hiding his feelings act
Image by klimkin from Pixabay

#26. You Have Undeniable Chemistry, but He’s Not Acting on It

Do you have great chemistry with a guy, but he’s not acting on it? If you find yourself in this situation, it’s probably because he likes you, but he’s fighting his feelings.

He might be attracted to you and even want to kiss you, but he’s holding back because he doesn’t want to get too close. Or, he might be afraid of rejection, or he might think you’re not interested in him.

Either way, it’s a sign he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

If you want to take things further with him, you might have to make the first move. But be warned, he might still back away even if you make a move.

It’s a risk you’ll have to take if you want to try and turn this situation into something more.

#27. He Notices Small Things About You

Does he notice small things about you? Like the way you style your hair, the type of clothes you wear, or even how you laugh?

If he does, it’s a sign he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

Why would he do this?

He might be trying to find things he has in common with you or trying to find excuses to talk to you. Or, he might just be genuinely interested in you, and he’s trying to get to know you better.

#28. He Might Pretend Not to See You at First

When he sees you, does he pretend not to see you first? He might look right past you or act like he hasn’t seen you even though he has.

If he does this, it’s because he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

Why would he do this?

He might be trying to play it cool or hoping you’ll make the first move. Or, he might be nervous about talking to you, and he’s trying to buy himself some time.

Whatever the reason, it’s a sign he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

#29. He Acts Protective Over You

If he’s acting protective over you, it’s a sign he’s fighting his feelings for you.

He might not even be aware that he’s doing it, but he’ll be on the lookout for anything that might threaten your safety or well-being.

He might go out of his way to walk you to your car at night, or he might offer to help you with a project that he knows is outside of your comfort zone.

Regardless of how he expresses it, his actions will clarify that he cares about you and wants to keep you safe. If you’re wondering whether he has feelings for you, this is a definite sign that he does.

#30. Gets Hurt When You Don’t Take his Advice

If he’s fighting his feelings for you, he may get hurt when you don’t take his advice.

He’s trying to be helpful because he wants you to be happy, but he can’t control how you feel.

If you’re not interested in his advice, he may start to doubt himself and wonder if he’s good enough for you. He may become withdrawn and stop offering his help altogether.

If he’s fighting his feelings for you, it’s best to let him know that you appreciate his help but need to make your own decisions. 

#31. His Body Language Will Give Him Away

If he’s fighting his feelings for you, his body language will give him away. He might be confident and self-assured with other girls, but he’ll turn into a fidgety mess when he’s around you.

He’ll start to fiddle with his hands, avoid eye contact, and generally just look uncomfortable.

This is a clear sign that he likes you but he’s fighting his feelings.

If you want to take things further with him, you’ll need to be patient and let him come to you in his own time. In the meantime, enjoy that he’s secretly interested in you!

The body language of a man who's hiding his feelings for you
Photo by Los Muertos Crew from Pexels

What to Do When He is Fighting His Feelings for You

Have an Honest Conversation about It

The best thing you can do when he’s fighting his feelings for you is to have an honest conversation.

You’ll need to be patient and understanding, but ultimately you should let him know that you’re interested in him and see if he feels the same way.

Suppose he does have feelings for you, great! You can take things from there. But if he doesn’t, at least you’ll know where you stand, and you can move on.

Give Him Space

Another thing you can do when he’s fighting his feelings for you is to give him space.

It’s possible that he just needs some time to sort out his feelings, and he’ll come around eventually.

In the meantime, you can focus on your own life and hobbies and let him come to you when he’s ready.

Consider Asking Him Out Yourself

If you’re interested in him and he’s taking too long to make a move, you could always consider asking him out yourself.

It might seem daunting, but it could be just the push he needs to admit his feelings for you finally.

And even if he doesn’t feel the same way, at least you’ll know for sure, and you can move on.

There you go!

Thanks for stopping by and reading my guide. Share this piece with a friend to help them too!

About The Author

Bijan Kholghi is a certified life coach with the Milton Erickson Institute Heidelberg (Germany). He helps clients and couples reach breakthroughs in their lives by changing subconscious patterns. His solution-oriented approach is based on Systemic- and Hypnotherapy.

Bijan